Tease
by Deichan
Summary: First person POV. Someone reflects on his relationship with someone else.. ^^


Disclaimers: "Tease" is by D. H. Lawrence   
Notes: Poemfic, POV   
  
Tease   
  
******   
  
I shall give you all my keys,   
You shall be my chatelaine,   
You shall enter as you please,   
As you please shall go again.   
  
You saved me when I was overcome with the sheer power of the ZERO system, called to me through my madness and drew me back to myself. I think that is where and when it began, out in space. I remember that time clearly, though it seemed that I could hear and see nothing. We battled as enemies, but when all was over you touched me with such tenderness, drew some measure of my pain onto yourself. I gave my soul to you, in that moment.   
  
When I hear you jingling through   
All the chambers of my soul,   
How I sit and laugh at you   
in your vain housekeeping.   
  
In the days after, when we journeyed back to the Earth, it was as if your every smile, every soft word and every tinkling bit of laughter echoed in my heart. It was different, though, and I chuckle in remembrance of how much you mothered me through my injuries. Like a brother,   
almost, one you never had, any of us had. But you were more than that. You were always trying to get inside me, beneath my hard and frozen facade. At the smallest admission on my part, you took more, searched my eyes for the whole of the truth and not just the part I allowed. You   
forgave me everything, you seemed you understood, tried to make me as pure as you saw me to be. Laughable.   
  
Jealous of the smallest cover,   
Angry at the simplest door;   
Well, you anxious, inquisitive lover,   
Are you pleased with what's in store?   
  
You balked at nothing, pressed on into my heart. You would be denied nothing, would you? Poor boy, you would be surprised at what my soul would have in wait for you. I look inside myself and see desolation, and I tried to hide that from you, not wanting to spoil your pristine   
beauty with my ugliness. But, you would have none of that. You truly are lovely when you're angry, do you realize that?   
  
You have fingered all my treasures,   
Have you not, most curiously   
Handled all my tools and measures   
And masculine machinery?   
  
And, ah, but you were such an innocent. You always have been, and that one night when I was recovering, and you came so near... you were surprised that night, weren't you? Oh, so very curious and eager, little one. You realized that night that you loved me as much as I adored you   
and we soared to the very stars.   
  
Over every single beautyÊ   
You have had your little rapture;   
You have slain, as was your duty,   
Every sin-mouse you could capture.   
  
I had you enthralled from then on; each gesture, every seemingly cold glare you worshiped, as if I was something deserving of worship. I was your heart, the very spirit that kept us fighting, and for that, I could do no wrong in your eyes. Everyone I killed, everything I destroyed, it was   
for the great and wondrous higher purpose that we fought for. You would not have me burdened with more guilt than I already was.Ê   
  
Still you are not satisfied,   
Still you tremble faint reproach;   
challenge me I keep aside   
Secrets that you may not broach.   
  
I watch you watching me in our bed at night, when we have the chance to catch a slight respite from the battle. I can see it in your eyes, that you are wondering what other things I keep inside, where I will not give you access. You would have me happy, take away that haunted look   
in my face whenever I see Relena. Wishing you knew its origin, you want to approach me, and I know you do.   
  
Maybe yes and maybe no,   
Maybe there are secret places,   
Alters barbarous below,   
Elsewhere halls of high disgraces.   
  
Let me tell you then, and end your agonizing. Perhaps I do keep secrets deep within my true essence of self, places no one can enter besides myself, and sometimes not even me. I have done terrible things in my life that I can admit only to myself, visions that haunt my living hours.   
  
Maybe yes and maybe no,   
You may have it as you please,   
Since I choose to keep you so,   
suppliant on your curious knees.   
  
But then again, it is your need to know such secrets that keeps you near me; even when you go for periods of time, you always return, or if I leave you come after me. Such is the control I have over your love for my mystery, my darkness and dark past. You would take these from me   
and so you stay near, close but never close enough to truly know. That is what makes you mine, sweet Quatre. 


End file.
